Like the title? I went through quite a few possibilities before I finally settled on this one. Unfortunately, it’s not referring to chocolate (although I do love Hershey kisses this time of year). This is actually a story, a true story. It’s one I haven’t told very often but it holds a special place in my heart.
It begins with a virgin girl in her twenties who had a passionate personality and love for people. She had never claimed a boyfriend or seriously dated anyone. She’d never even been kissed. This girl knew she was in a major minority. She’d see billboards all over California saying things like “STILL A VIRGIN? CALL: 1-800-500-0000.” In Cali, to even say “virgin” was like a swear word… everyone gasps like you’ve got a disease. She even saw Oprah do a show where the talk-show hostess “helped” 40-year-old virgins conquer their sexual “handicap.”
The pressure had always been intense. As a teenager, everyone the girl knew paired off. Her best friend became pregnant. Guys who had been friends with the girl stopped talking with her when she didn’t want to date them. Back then, she didn’t even want to date because she felt like it would be ridiculously complicated. High school was complicated enough. She got guff for her decision… lots of it.
One guy in her freshman computer class even asked the girl, “How do you know you’re gonna like a guy if you don’t try him out first?” Unromantic, utilitarian reasoning like that convinced her all the more that her decision to wait was a better choice. Ultimately, she knew she could be just like everyone else in a second but they could never get back what she still had.
She’d known too many girls who, out of a desire to feel special and loved, got into romantic relationships without any intention of ever committing to the guy in marriage eventually. “What’s the point in this?” she thought, “So, a person’s emotions are wrapped up in a relationship they think might tank eventually and when it ends, hearts are broken and the pure, sweet tenderness of a first love is lost.” She knew it was possible for second, third, and fourth loves to succeed, she just felt like it was simply more worthwhile to wait until you are sure you could commit to a person in marriage. In fact, it became a passionate, romantic drive to protect everything that belonged to the guy she would someday marry. To her, the perfect kiss would be dressed in white and would come right after her mouth formed the “O” in “I do.”
The girl has since continued to fight for her purity and is holding out hope that some guy out there is doing the same. Her story is still far from over. How do I know? That girl is a fiery redhead named Brittany who just typed her own story. My kiss and tell is backwards – tell and then kiss. So everyone now knows when and where it will happen. So stay tuned.
I’ve had people ask me if my expectations are too high. I’m not ranking guys according to their hair color, body-build, or education. But I’ve prayed a lot about this subject. Guarding my heart has not been easy. I’m a feisty, passionate redhead with a proclivity to flirt and a crazy romantic streak. But I’ve also had a dad who loves me and made me feel beautiful and precious. He always told me that my heart is the most amazing part of who I am and will be worth winning when the time comes. Dads are often the sole reason girls have the strength to deal with relationships.
However, even without a loving earthly dad, sexual and emotional purity is something every girl can have. In spite of the way it is portrayed in the media, falling in-love with the wrong guys produces heartache; giving away your body before marriage has consequences. Saving both is the coolest thing you can do for yourself and for the guy who commits his life to you. For those who have given their heart away already or been involved physically, choices from here on still make a difference. Every day is fresh with no mistakes in it; you decide where you go from here.
This could be your story.
Happy Valentine’s Day!!!